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Marmara in the News

MANGALORE,  MARCH 19, 2014

‘Political discourse should include violence on women’

Special Correspondent

Corinne Kumar, founder-member of Vimochana and International Coordinator of World Courts of Women , speaking at Balmatta Ground in Mangalore on Tuesday.

Women have been “invisible-ised” and the truth about violence against women must be brought into the public said Corinne Kumar, founder-member of Vimochana, Bangalore, and International Coordinator of World Courts of Women.

“We have been invisible-ised. The truth must be brought into the public and into the political discourse,” she said at “Marmara” (literally, “murmuring sound of leaves” in Kannada, used here to represent women’s murmurs on violence against them), a discussion organised by the Forum against Atrocities on Women, in the city on Tuesday.

Ms. Kumar said women should continue to voice their concerns which would give it “wings and feet” and make it part of the agenda of political parties, which are involved only in “power-mongering”. Speaking and connecting to other people working on their concerns was especially important for “subalterns”- groups left out of the mainstream who go unheard.

When two students from the Northeast studying in Mangalore colleges spoke on how they had to face only “small” problems in Mangalore, she said violence was so widespread that women had come to accept it.

Discrimination

Joy Mercia, a student from the Northeast studying here, said, “We are much safer in Mangalore unlike other cities with a lot of discrimination.” She said they face “small issues” such as being addressed in derogatory terms, being manhandled and subjected to discrimination because they look different.Marygold, also a student from the North East, said, “We are facing discrimination in colleges. Our dress at home is different and when we wear our dress, people pass remarks.”

Ms. Kumar said, “These are not small things. They are seemingly invisible and very violent forms (of violence) against women. What you are doing is accepting the violence.”

Merlin Martis, a participant, said migrant workers are a section who struggle without basic facilities. Legal aid is “dead” and the police is highly communalised with politicians supporting them. She said, “This is affecting the place and women’s lives here severely.”

Parineeta, a participant, said the State should look beyond “a regimented model” of women and recognise alternative gender models which must get their space too.

Shahnaz, another participant, said, “I want to know which political party is talking about issues concerned with women.”

Vidya Dinker of the Forum said discussions would be held all over Karnataka; in Mangalore, it would be before the elections, on “Development and displacement”, and after elections on problems of North East people here and one more in Belthangady on issues there.

http://www.thehindu.com/todays-paper/tp-national/tp-karnataka/political-discourse-should-include-violence-on-women/article5803373.ece

BANGALORE:  APR 24, 2014

This movement’s a tree-for-all

Diljith George

A barely-four-week old movement, Marmara is inviting the underprivileged, voiceless communities to share their stories, and they are doing it out in the open, under the trees
When the wind meets the leaves, a beautiful music is created. And for Corrine Kumar, this music provided inspiration to start a unique social and political movement called Marmara, which in Kannada translates to the rustling of leaves. What sets this initiative apart from others is its vision, namely, to provide a platform for affected communities to engage with the general public and discuss their problems, and it is all done in an informal setting — under the trees, which according to Kumar, is perfect.
“Trees are powerful symbols in all cultures, they connect us with others, and sitting round a tree to talk to people is a natural choice, because it is a non-hierarchical space, a non-patriarchal space, a nurturing space, a nourishing space,” says Kumar about the concept. Not surprisingly, these chat sessions are referred to by the members as ‘trees’. “Marmara is not a campaign, it is an ideology, of people coming together and starting a healing process not only among themselves but for a larger good,” says Parthan, one of the programme organisers.
To give wings to her concept, Kumar first sent open invitations to various social organizations and individuals who are active participants in political movements. And thusly, Marmara organised it’s first ‘tree’ on violence against women and alcoholism, on April 13 at Jeevanbhimanagar, with the help of Vimochana, an organisation working for the welfare of women. Kumar knew she had hit upon a good idea when the event saw even regular housewives turning up for it to discuss their stories. While initially, the movement focussed on different facets of violence against women including trafficking, with different organisations like Jan Sahyog and Sangama joining hands, the concept has grown to include other issues.
Previous ‘trees’ have tackled subjects such as ‘child abuse and children from the devadasi community’. A ‘tree’ on eviction made a great impact with victims of the Ejipura slum eviction coming forward to take part in it. Another ‘tree’ on development had people strongly opposing Modi’s high-energy developmental model. “Marmara is a very decentralised movement and that makes it more closer to people,” states Kalpana, a social activist from Vimochana”.
Impressively, for a movement that is merely 4-weeks-old, Marmara sure seems to be on a war footing. So, after chalking up 38 ‘trees’ so far, the 39th one is slated for April 27, at Anekal. The subject for the day will be Water, and among topics to be discussed will be water meters and water mafia. With no mood to let up anytime soon, further ‘trees’ have been planned to discuss subjects as diverse as youth rights, nuclear issues, problems faced by North-Eastern migrants etc, in Bangalore and other parts of Karnataka.

http://epaper.dnaindia.com/story.aspx?id=20211&boxid=35947&ed_date=2014-04-24&ed_code=860009&ed_page=2

The cycle of abuse is a harmful pattern that happens in relationships or families. It has four main parts: tension building, the bad incident, making up, and a temporary calm. Here are some characteristics of the abuse cycle.

The tension-building phase marks the beginning, where minor conflicts, passive-aggressive behavior, or communication breakdowns escalate. During this period, the victim often feels a sense of walking on eggshells, anticipating the looming outburst or violence from the abuser. The victim is often filled with fear and anxiety. 

The incident phase is the event of abuse—whether physical, emotional, verbal, or psychological. This can manifest in various forms, such as aggressive behavior, manipulation, threats, or violence. The victim becomes the target. The severity and duration of this phase can vary, but it leaves deep scars on the victim’s mind, creating lasting trauma.

Following the incident, a phase of reconciliation often occurs. The abuser may show remorse, seek forgiveness, or offer apologies and promises to change. This phase is marked by a temporary calm, with the abuser often exhibiting affection, kindness, or making efforts to reconcile the relationship. The victim, desperate for relief from the abuse, may hold onto these moments of apparent normalcy, hoping things will genuinely improve. In some cases, the victim may feel safe safe when the abuse stops. It is also incredibly normal for the victim to feel sympathy for the abuser at this stage. 

However, the calm phase is fleeting, leading back to the tension-building stage as unresolved issues resurface or new triggers emerge. The cycle perpetuates, often intensifying with each iteration. Over time, the abuse can escalate in severity and frequency, causing significant damage to the victim’s self-esteem, mental health, and overall well-being.

In cases of domestic abuse, Stockholm Syndrome can occur when a victim starts empathizing with or defending the abuse due to prolonged exposure to abuse and manipulation. Victims might feel emotionally dependent on their abuser, believing that their safety or well-being relies on maintaining a relationship with them. This psychological response can be a survival mechanism, where the victim copes with the traumatic situation by forming a bond with the abuser. The victim might fear leaving the relationship due to threats, intimidation, or a distorted belief that they cannot survive without the abuser. Many people fear the societies reactions to leaving their abuser, especially when the victim’s abuser is their husband. Breaking this cycle requires recognition, intervention, and support. Victims need a safe environment, resources, and guidance to escape the abusive situation. Additionally, abusers often require specialized therapy and support to address the root causes of their behavior and learn healthier coping mechanisms. Understanding the cycle of abuse is crucial in preventing its perpetuation and offering support to those affected.

Marmara

Date –25th September, 2018
Theme – Lynching
Resource Person – Shujayathulla, ISI

On September 25, 2018 around 25 women gathered at the Surya MahilaSeva Sangha, Mico Layout for a Marmara to discuss the prevalent issue of lynching. After a brief introduction of the members from Vimochana and Mr. Shujayathulla, the resource person from Indian Social Institute, the women were given an overview of Marmara, an initiative by Vimochana. They were also introduced to ‘BateinAman Ki’, a campaign planned between September 22 and October 13, 2018, to galvanize women and men across India to rise to propagate peace, harmony, love and safeguard constitutional values. They were invited for the event on September 27 at Freedom Park.

As Shujayathulla started to talk about lynching, the women got into a serious discussion on this ghastly act hounding our Country in recent times. He narrated various incidents of lynching resulting in the deaths of 79 people since 2014. He also emphasized that the reason for these acts were petty and were mostly targeted at Muslims, Dalits and other minority groups.

As the discussion progressed, the women expressed their opinion that during incidents like these, their voice would not be heard and nobody would be willing to listen to them if they stood with the victim and they also feared that they might get into problems. They were also very disturbed with the reaction of the government to these acts. They were advised that Marmara could be a medium where they can be heard collectively and it will be more effective to gather in groups and show solidarity to fight against such social crimes.

As most of them were domestic workers they also wanted to know more about what facilities/benefits they could avail from the Government. They were assured that another awareness program will be held in the coming days to give them more details on the same.

Date –25th September, 2018
Theme – Lynching
Resource Person – Shujayathulla, ISI

On September 25, 2018 around 25 women gathered at the Surya MahilaSeva Sangha, Mico Layout for a Marmara to discuss the prevalent issue of lynching. After a brief introduction of the members from Vimochana and Mr. Shujayathulla, the resource person from Indian Social Institute, the women were given an overview of Marmara, an initiative by Vimochana. They were also introduced to ‘BateinAman Ki’, a campaign planned between September 22 and October 13, 2018, to galvanize women and men across India to rise to propagate peace, harmony, love and safeguard constitutional values. They were invited for the event on September 27 at Freedom Park.

As Shujayathulla started to talk about lynching, the women got into a serious discussion on this ghastly act hounding our Country in recent times. He narrated various incidents of lynching resulting in the deaths of 79 people since 2014. He also emphasized that the reason for these acts were petty and were mostly targeted at Muslims, Dalits and other minority groups.

As the discussion progressed, the women expressed their opinion that during incidents like these, their voice would not be heard and nobody would be willing to listen to them if they stood with the victim and they also feared that they might get into problems. They were also very disturbed with the reaction of the government to these acts. They were advised that Marmara could be a medium where they can be heard collectively and it will be more effective to gather in groups and show solidarity to fight against such social crimes.

As most of them were domestic workers they also wanted to know more about what facilities/benefits they could avail from the Government. They were assured that another awareness program will be held in the coming days to give them more details on the same.

Date: 21st September, 2018
Topic : Issue on Rape
Resource Person : Celine, Vimochana

Starting with an introduction of Vimochana, the group of 20 women who had gathered at Andrahalli, Vemgal were given details on the campaign ‘Batein Aman Ki’ and were invited for the event on the 27th of September, 2018 at Freedom Park. They were also told the reason why a Marmara is needed to discuss core issues faced by women in our country.

Celine, the resource person from Vimochana mentioned that India is a democratic country and the constitution states that all Indians have equal rights. Even though society is depriving women of these rights to livewith dignity, women’s achievements have been scaling in various fields. These achievements are posing a great threat to men and hence they are trying to suppress women in the name of protection.

The discussion moved on to the increase in sexual crimes against minors. For example, the recent incident of sexual assault on a minor girl in Malur on August 2, 2018 was dreadful.The sexual harassment that a woman faces at her work place by her colleagues and her boss and women being blackmailed and threatened has become common these days.

The women who attended the program were eager to know how they could protect their girls from such incidents. They often getworried to send their girls to school and work.Celine advised them to create awareness among children and teach them self-defence. Such awareness programs in schools would also be an important initiative.

As Prabhavati from Vimochana rendered a motivating song, the women who attended this program requested our team to conduct such Marmaras more frequently to update them on social issues.

Date: 21st September, 2018
Topic : Issue on Rape
Resource Person : Celine, Vimochana

On September 20, 2018, around 400 students of Sacred HeartCollege for Women participated in a Marmara on Rape. The Marmara was held at the college auditorium and was convened by Mrs. Tabassum of Vimochana, with Dr. Sheela as the resource person from Enfold India.

The students were first introduced to Vimochana and our activities including Marmara and were also invited for ‘BateinAman Ki’, event at Freedom Park on September 27, a campaign that aims to fight back against the targeted attacks on the constitutional rights of women in India.. Dr. Sheela then spoke on rape, including marital rape, of how girls were trapped for sex by their boy friends, uncles and guardians. She also discussed the prevalence of male dominance in spite of men statistics showing that they are only 35% of the total population against the 65% being women and children.

Even though some men agree about women having equal rights, they really don’t care to speak out since it does not affect them in any way. She felt that there was a need to change the mindset of men within the household. Even the terminologies we use seem to be so biased, for example, words like master, doctor, chairman, etc. which sound masculine.

As she advised the girls to stand up and speak for their rights at home and in society, the girls responded by continuously applauding for her.

 

Date – 24th September, 2018
Theme – Rape and Communal Violence
Resource Person – Soumya Bhat, SASHA & Santy Silvia, VIVA

On 24thof September 2018,around 200+ students from St Aloysius Degree College participated in a Marmara, an initiative by Vimochana. The students had prepared several charts on rape and Communal violence, the theme of the Marmara.The speakers for this event were Ms. Santa Silvia of VIVA and Ms.Soumya Bhat, an Advocate and a Joint Convener of SASHA (Support Against Sexual Harassment). Ms.Soumya brought in several examples from her work to facilitate discussion on what provokes people to commit such grievous offense like rape? The students were asked to share their thoughts on the recent incidents of rape. In response, the students referred to theKathua incident and many more incidents involving minors and minorities. Ms.Soumya Bhat made them reflect on how inequality that exists in society perpetratesthese sexual violence against a particular community to shame them or to make them feel inferior.

Ms. Santa Silvia who works with an International NGO working with women and children gave a beautiful story for the audience to understand what a rape would actually mean – that if a boy has physical contact with a girl without her consent, even if they are in love with each other would account for rape! Ironically, many students were not willing to agree to this. Ms. Santa then explained to them that to touch a girl without her consent in itself is offensive. She even brought in the patriarchal influence on a woman’s life from her birth and how this inequality will continue if students don’t speak and act on it. One of the main reasons for a rise in sexual violence was attributed to pornography and movies with erotic scenes which is easily accessible these days. Referring to communal violence, Ms. Soumya Bhat made students to reflect the cruelty in killing someone for not adhering to a belief or for simply eating something of their choice!

As a feedback at the end of the session, one of the student expressed that movies are just a form of art and not everyone will get spoiled watching them. Another student was of the opinion that rapes are committed merely because of lust or revenge on someone.

Date – 24th September, 2018
Theme – Rape and Communal Violence
Resource Person – Soumya Bhat, SASHA & Santy Silvia, VIVA

On 24thof September 2018,around 200+ students from St Aloysius Degree College participated in a Marmara, an initiative by Vimochana. The students had prepared several charts on rape and Communal violence, the theme of the Marmara.The speakers for this event were Ms. Santa Silvia of VIVA and Ms.Soumya Bhat, an Advocate and a Joint Convener of SASHA (Support Against Sexual Harassment). Ms.Soumya brought in several examples from her work to facilitate discussion on what provokes people to commit such grievous offense like rape? The students were asked to share their thoughts on the recent incidents of rape. In response, the students referred to theKathua incident and many more incidents involving minors and minorities. Ms.Soumya Bhat made them reflect on how inequality that exists in society perpetratesthese sexual violence against a particular community to shame them or to make them feel inferior.

Ms. Santa Silvia who works with an International NGO working with women and children gave a beautiful story for the audience to understand what a rape would actually mean – that if a boy has physical contact with a girl without her consent, even if they are in love with each other would account for rape! Ironically, many students were not willing to agree to this. Ms. Santa then explained to them that to touch a girl without her consent in itself is offensive. She even brought in the patriarchal influence on a woman’s life from her birth and how this inequality will continue if students don’t speak and act on it. One of the main reasons for a rise in sexual violence was attributed to pornography and movies with erotic scenes which is easily accessible these days. Referring to communal violence, Ms. Soumya Bhat made students to reflect the cruelty in killing someone for not adhering to a belief or for simply eating something of their choice!

As a feedback at the end of the session, one of the student expressed that movies are just a form of art and not everyone will get spoiled watching them. Another student was of the opinion that rapes are committed merely because of lust or revenge on someone.